The First Time

I worked in retail for over three years in three different stores: Lane Bryant,  LOFT (Ann Taylor Loft back then), and finally Banana Republic. Three years of associate discounts expanded my wardrobe exponentially and broke my bank simultaneously. It was while working at LOFT that I really began to find my own style: a love of pencil skirts, fitted silhouettes, streamlined classics, and just a touch of daring. One holiday season (nearly 4 years ago now), I started wearing belts at my waist. Right at my waist. I remember feeling self-conscious about this, like everyone working and shopping thought I might be making a huge fashion faux pas. I continued to do it, relishing in how the styling highlighted my curves, accentuated my waist and was the easiest kind of accessorizing. I was still hesitant, but I was hooked. This was the exact outfit I wore that day, that first time for a now frequent styling.

Sweater - LOFT / Belt - Lane Bryant / "Perfect" black pencil skirt - Simply Be / Handbag - Furla /
Shaping Sheers - Spanx / Heels - Nine West

A couple weeks after I debuted my belted waist, a fellow LOFT associate wore the exact.same.outfit. Right down to sweater (it WAS an ATL sweater after all), skirt and placement of belt. I'm not going to lie - at first I was uber annoyed, especially since said associate was of the tiny, gorgeous, long blonde hair and long fluttery lashes variety. Let's face it, I was also jealous that she seemed to rock my outfit idea so much better than I did and possibly threatened that my personal sense of style had been usurped. But the more I thought about it - and continue to think about it -  the more flattered I am. I, the resident curvy girl, seemed to set a trend. I, the resident curvy girl, rocked that trend in a way that made other (skinny) people want to wear it too. Shocked as I am by the realization (as one who continues to battle self-esteem and body image issues), I can't deny that it was moment that has defined my personal style and, more importantly, self-confidence in that style.

I actually haven't worn this outfit since then, though I have most certainly worn variations of it. Wearing it again makes me think about how my personal style has changed, how it has stayed the same, and how it has given me a kind of identity. I find such contemplation ultimately important for this, my 200th post. It wasn't intentional, interestingly, but that makes it all more special. Serendipitous. The reasons I started this blog - as a way to subconsciously confront, and hopefully someday squelch, those pesky self-esteem and body image issues of mine - continue to carry me through and inspire me, and to provide proof that it has done so. As we approach the season of giving thanks, I find myself thankful for the endeavor, and for you, the community of bloggers and readers that bolster it.

Ring - Lane Bryant / Necklace - Talbots / Earrings - The Limited

I'll be taking a little hiatus next week for the holiday (we're traveling to Boston to spend time with Bob's family and friends), but you can be rest assured that I'll return in all my fancy holiday-dressing glory as I work through another busy Nutcracker weekend. I hope everyone has a wonderfully thankful Thanksgiving until then. =)

The Alternative

It's funny how different I photograph when my hair is up. My face looked puffier in my full-on smiling pictures this morning, so I tried a closed-mouth smirk today. When I make this face with my hair down, I just look mean. Strange...

Today was one of those days where I just wanted to go to work in sweats, but I opted for jeans and a cardigan instead. I think it's funny that such an outfit has become the alternative to "slumming it." But, really, that's the point!

When I think about my style, which is certainly one of the things this blog has forced me to do, I've really come to understand how I'm drawn to classic silhouettes, minimal patterns, and a simple color palette. I also rely on "special pieces" - like this embellished cardigan - that can impart the bulk of an outfit's interest. Part of that is not exactly knowing how or in which way to branch out more, but the main part is the fact that, above all, I dress for my body. I dress to emphasize the narrowest, best parts of my shape. I know that I'm not always as successful as I could be, and maybe I take fewer risks as a result, but my goal is always that hourglass. It's been a hard road to acceptance (and I haven't yet arrived), but I don't have the luxury of wearing whatever I want, as many as layers as I want, as many patterns or shapes - I just don't have the body for it. Most of the time, that sucks. I gotta be honest about that. As a girl who loves clothes and loves to wear clothes, my size 14-on-top-16-on-bottom-body, with most of my weight in my midsection, limits things. And maybe that's the sole source of all my body issues - not getting to wear what's featured in the magazines and in the stores, or in my favorite blogs... But, I still dress the body I have, and I'd like to think I've really honed that over the years, even as my body and tastes change. And even if my outfit might be considered "boring" at least I know - or at least am beginning to accept - that my curves never are...

White cardigan with grey floral applique - The Limited / Grey tank - LOFT / Flare leg jeans - Lane Bryant /
Grey faux-suede pumps - Kohl's

I have to say goodbye to my lovely Furla tomorrow, and I'm not sure if I'll be able to fit in another outfit with her before I need to send her back, so this might be it. It's been a beautiful blue-hued month with her at my side!  I just can't afford to purchase her right now, but maybe someday. Or maybe Santa will take a hint...

On Casual Style (or the Lack Thereof)

I didn't post yesterday. I'm barely mustering up enough motivation to post today. I know no one is breathing down my neck to post daily - I'm keeping this blog for me after all - but I think that's the most important reason to post, anyway.

What is comes down to is the fact that I haven't loved my ensembles these past couple of days, let alone have I wanted to broadcast them. But making myself write this post (and looking critically at my outfit pictures) has made me realize where I need the most room for improvement in my personal style: my casual wardrobe. I do dressy really well. Sexy secretary? You bet. Elegant cocktail dress? Bring it. Stylish work/event-wear? Easy. Friday night out at high-end bar? I can do that, too. But give me a regular old day that I want to look put-together but still dressed-down? Muddy waters. These are the days when my closet throws up on my floor and I come out of my room depressed and frustrated with my body. I just don't seem to have a middle-ground in my style vocabulary. I can't seem to dress casually AND stylishly.

I guess that's why I've always preferred to overdress for jobs/events/outings in my adult life - I just don't know how to do anything else! Last week's "Dressed-up Denim" challenge started opening my eyes up to that fact, and these past few days have solidified it. The whole wide world of casual dressing is a big black hole in my personal style.

Maybe it's my body type; maybe it's my preference for femininity and elegance; maybe it's my handicap when it comes to layering; maybe (and probably) it's some strange restriction I've seemed to impose on matching colors (something I've just recently realized). I MUST BRANCH OUT! Thanks to this blog, I know I'm trying - and I'm proud of a number of outfits featured here where I felt like I did it successfully - but I want to do better. In the end, it is the one area of my style that I truly want to change. It's important that I do it, however, in a way that doesn't involve spending (more) money at the mall. When I say I want to shop in my closet, that's exactly what I want (need) to shop in my closet for.

It's becoming painfully obvious that this is something I cannot do the morning before I go to work. I think it's time to spend a weekend in my closet, and really looking through my favorite blogs for inspiration that still speaks to my personal style and existing wardrobe. I know this is what all the successful bloggers say to do. I just need to find some time, the frame of mind, a good drink, and maybe even a good friend, to do it with.

Do any of you experience similar woes, or have similar desires to change something about your personal style? Do you even have or want a "personal style"? Where do you go or what do you do for inspiration?

Dressed-Up Denim, Part 1

I've been thinking about how causal my workplace is during the day. We're talkin' a jeans and t-shirt kind of place (for the most part). Truth be told, a casual vibe emanates from the top, and it's felt in more than the way we dress. I don't mean to suggest that I have a problem with any of it - in fact, I love it; it's one of the things that makes the place so unique and vibrant - but I do get dressed lately (i.e. with my blog in mind) knowing that I'm probably going to stand out. But who are we kidding, here - I love that too. =D

This week, there are fewer performances; nothing, in fact, until Sunday night. (That's not entirely true - there's a big non-performance event on Friday, but that affects EVERYONE for once.) As a result, my week looks a little more like everyone else's, and my wardrobe choices are tamed down quite a bit, too - I'm simply not going to wear a dress or pencil skirt on the days there aren't performances. Some of you might reply with a "Why not?" and that does give me pause, but I guess I've noticed that I save my "best" outfits for performance nights. I mean, not every day can be a pencil skirt day (I just don't have THAT many!), especially in this casual work environment of mine. However, it does give me license to expand my dressy-casual wardrobe vocabulary, especially when I would usually just use the opportunity of a non-performance day to dress in flip flops, crops and a tee. No, even though that was short-lived, I don't want to continue that habit. I've said it before and I'll say it again - I have far too many clothes to wear that sort of uniform ever day! More importantly, a girl doesn't have to wear a pencil skirt to look her best every day, even if the girl does rock them... =)

All this brings me to today's outfit - dressed-up jeans.

 (Why do my cutest poses always come out so blurry?)

Beige suiting jacket - NY&Co / Eggplant sequin bib tee - LOFT / Boot-cut jeans - Lane Bryant /
Camel peep-toes - Banana Republic

While it would have been easy to go into work in jeans, tennies and a sweatshirt (especially after the weekend I had), I pulled together this number instead.  It's a pretty classic ensemble - suiting jacket worn as separates, jeans, and embellished tee. I feel pretty pulled together, yet totally comfortable at the same time. I do have to admit, though, that this seems a little too conservative for my usual style, even with the sequined bibbing on the front of the shirt. It's definitely the jacket that makes me feel more buttoned up than usual (and I preferred to keep it buttoned to define my waist), and since the top is plainly the focal piece, I was just somewhat at a loss (and with little time this morning) to experiment with other layering option that allowed it to be so. (Any suggestions?)  But, I went with it anyway - and I was even complimented on the look in line at a cafe!

It was chilly out this morning, which is another reason I required more substantial layering options. Yes, fall has definitely arrived! I even almost wore boots! But no, I'm not QUITE ready for socks yet...  I went with these comfy peep toes instead, even if I was reminded that it's time for a pedicure...

Because of the tee's embellishment as the neckline, I went without a necklace, but I took the opportunity to wear more playful earrings. I kept my ring toned down, too.

Earrings  - LOFT / Gold and enamel ring - Banana Republic

I think the rest of this week (until Friday, anyway) is officially dressed-up denim week for me. Stay tuned for what I pull together tomorrow!

"Dress for the Job You Want"

So I work at a large performing arts center, whose season just begun this past weekend. As the patron services director, I oversee everything in front of the curtain - that is, everything dealing with our patrons. I and my staff make sure the performances start on time, that the patrons are seated correctly and know where they're going, etc., etc.. I have a staff of about 50 employees - all students (the Center is part of the university) and up to 4000 patrons might come through our doors if all of our four houses were open.  Needless to say, it can get busy. But, I love my job. I've always been involved in some sort of customer service field, and my educational background is in the arts (specifically music history), so this job is the perfect confluence of my experiences. 

I also love my job because, well, I get to dress my best for the events (read: because I will be seen by LOTS of people - donors, bosses, other important people I might need to impress.) I always dressed up when I was a teaching assistant in grad school, too - unlike just about every other grad student I knew and worked with.  But, I was in front of people! I had to represent!  (Even if they were only college students in their pajamas...) When I became a regular old graduate assistant (sans teaching), I would dress up more often than not, but I was always clearly overdressed for my little 10 hour/week office job. My excuse was "I worked in retail for 3 years, and I have a lot of clothes to show for it. I gotta wear this stuff!" As a curvy girl my entire life, though, I always felt that dressing up mitigated the fact that I was larger. I felt more comfortable in my skin because I knew I was looking my very best, despite the size I wore.  I wanted people to see my style, my ability to look "so put together" (a compliment I did often receive), not just a big girl trying to hide herself. Perhaps, too, I followed that whole addage "dress for the job you want" because, well, I moved from the GA in Patron Services to the Patron Services Director in a year.


I do have to admit that, over the course of my first year in this job, I've gotten way more relaxed in my attire than I have ever allowed myself before (yes, even as a grad student!), especially during the summer in the "off-season."  Jeans, flip flops, hoodie, VERY little make-up, hair always up - I wasn't trying very hard if there wasn't a performance that day. But now that the season's started again, and because I really want to commit to changing how I see myself on a daily basis (the main reason for this blog, after all), I have every reason to do myself up right for event nights.  I don't get too fancy or anything - I still have to dress somewhat professionally, but I'm not a buttoned-up suit kinda girl and I never will be. The Center has a causal but thrillingly energentic vibe, too, which generally seems to complement my own personal style.

At the foundation of today's outfit (aside from Spanx, anyway) is a nice little cardi and pants combo (for tonight's dance performance that has a smaller audience), but done up with a colorful belt, fab neutral heels and handbag (I wore the Steve Madden I featured on Tuesday), and a statement necklace.   As I'm sure you'll notice in future posts, I LOVE me some statement necklaces, especially when they can impart a needed pop of color.

Powder blue cardigan - LOFT

Ivory satin-trimmed tank - Banana Republic

Beige wide-leg pants - NY&Co

Yellow faux-croc belt - The Limited

Pearly drop earrings - The Limited

Yellow statement necklace - Urban Outfitters

Camel peep-toes - Banana Republic 

Shoe inserts - FootPetals

Self-confidence. Blog. Work.  Here's to having lots of reasons to dress well!

An 'E' for Effort

This was not a good day to start broadcasting my outfits, methinks.  I felt like I was hit by a bus when I woke up, and it was gloomy outside to boot. I loathed getting up, not to mention the idea of having to do anything with myself today, but I convinced myself I had to put in some effort lest I completely contradict the entire premise of this blog. Three outfits later - with the remains still splayed all over my bed - I resigned myself that today was not going to my best styling effort. I hate to be such a bummer in only my second post (!), but we all have these days, right?!? I shall also blame PMS...

It also doesn't help that, like most of the Midwest, we are in-between seasons here.  Last week was gorgeous mid-60s to low-70s weather that allowed you to start experimenting with layers again. This week we're back to mid-80s and muggy. I think I speak for a lot of people that I just want cooler temps to come and stay! It really does make it awful to dress.  I'm so over my summery dresses, but I just can't fathom boots and long sleeves yet... Though, if this weather continues much longer, I'll just say "screw it" and deal with overheating myself. Beauty is pain, eh?

In the end, I threw on a generally reliable, cute summer knit strapless dress in a lovely peachy color that looks fab with my complexion. Paired with a cropped (read: too small) jean jacket, a little fun jewelry, some gold t-strap sandals, and an iced coffee with almond milk (a new addiction), I called it a day.

I experimented with taking photos on my own this morning, since the BF had long gone to work, but I'm clearly not going to be able to get a good shot on my own. I'm either going to need to get a tripod or wait until the evening when he returns to take/post pics, as I had to do today (and that was quite an ordeal, lemme tell you).  Shopping on Amazon for one as soon as I post this...Any suggestions?  Must also continue to experiment with locations, lighting, and poses...

So here I am! (Sorry for the poor picture quality in the first one - I'm working on it.) Color and accessories shall be the stars today...

Strapless coral dress with beige stitching - Lane Bryant / Denim jacket - Theory, eBayed /

Gold t-strap sandals - Moda Spana, Endless

Gold "polygon" necklace - Banana Republic / Turquoise and gold "Epanema" ring - Banana Republic /

Coral earrings - LOFT

Tan handbag - Steve Madden "BCouture" Satchel in Peanut, Endless